Category Archives: self-esteem

The Digital Camera as an Indispensable Tool

In his book, Developing the Leader Within You, John Maxwell says, A leader’s main responsibility is developing others to do the work. In order to be an effective people developer, a leader must first know the names of his people, especially if he is new to them and the people he is handling are 400 or more.

When I was new to my present regional office, I required the employees to wear their identification cards around their necks so that I will know their names.  But later on, I feel awkward looking at their IDs everytime we meet.  I feel more comfortable looking at their faces, seeing them eye to eye, smiling and greeting them; Hi, Hello, Good Morning/Afternoon or How are you?

I always carry my digital camera in my bag wherever I go.  This tool has helped me a lot in my desire to be a people person and be a good leader.  Whenever there are meetings, conferences, seminars and special occasions, I request someone to capture the events for me.  I also take pictures during my inspection and other official trips.

A pose with some employees.

Pictures keep the memories alive but they have done more use to me as the head of office.  I store the pictures in the laptop, make folders of each event and indicate names of people on it through the help of my executive assistant and other employees.

Now that I know how to use some applications of the famous social networking site, the Facebook, identifying people became a lot easier because I could now tag people in the pictures.  I find time to look at them whenever I get hold of my laptop so that I can call them by names everytime we meet.  People feel worthwhile and important if you care to know their names.

Being a good leader does not happen overnight and I know that through my digital camera, I have taken a step towards my desire.

I know you also have some good uses of your digital camera and I’m glad if you could share your list with us by leaving your  comments below this article.

Your friend,

Nimia Acebes

Ten Behavior Patterns Resorted to by People to Hide Their Lack of Self-Esteem

In the book, Creating Confidence, Rex Johnson and David Swindley define self-esteem as the feeling of worth you have about yourself; the value you place on you.  Like oxygen or electricity, you can’t see, hear, taste or smell it, but you know when it’s not there.

Lack of self-esteem means you feel yourself worthless and valueless.  It is important that we know who among our associates or co-workers lack self-esteem so that we know how to deal with them and help them.  This deficiency can cause low motivation, low energy levels, low physical activity and poor relationship with people.

Mistakably, we think that loud, arrogant people have high self-esteem and quiet people have not.  Generally, the most confident people are quiet about their achievements, get on with their lives, doing as they please and enjoying themselves.  Still waters run deep!

According to psychotherapists Rex Johnson and David Swindley, many desperately try to cover up their lack of self-esteem, but a well-tuned observer can spot the truth quite easily.

Here are the ten behavior patterns resorted to by people to hide a lack of self-esteem:

1.  The Critic

He is fond of criticizing and belittling people, especially those who are more successful than him; an unhappy way to justify himself.  He is unable to come up with constructive suggestion or positive action of his own.

2,  The Shrinking Violet

He avoids the limelight and shrinks into the background, convinced that he’s not worth anyone’s attention.  He could not accept a compliment because he’s spent many years believing he is inadequate.

3.  The Complainer

He can’t stop himself complaining, get great pleasure from it, and take every opportunity to practice his art.  Whatever happens, he’s not happy.

4.  The Addict

Eating disorders, phobias and addictive habits such as anorexia, bulimia, smoking and alcoholism are usually behaviors of a person who lack self-esteem.

5.  The Mouse

He is afraid to expose his true feelings because he cannot face possible rejection.  He creeps around like a mouse, too timid to express an opinion.  He avoids complaining even when he has every reason to do so.

6.  The Sheep

He follows the herd in order to be accepted into certain circles or groups.  He doesn’t trust his own individuality enough to go his own way.

7.  The Big Mouth

On the face of it, he is the opposite of the mouse.  He cannot stop talking, and this behavior comes in two categories.  The first is worried that he won’t get another chance to say his piece; once he engages you in conversation it is hard to get away.  The second is a habitual braggart, with little regard for truth.  He boasts and promises on anything he could not afford to fulfill.

8.  The Put-Down Expert

He has a quick insult, a barbed comment for everybody who crossed his path.  He thinks the only way he could impress is by using his sharp cleverness to put others down.

9.  The Begrudger

He is the jealous individual who feels that anyone who has something he wants doesn’t really deserve it.  Through jealousy, he dislikes people who are successful.  He doesn’t have the sufficient self-confidence to be able to say ‘Well done, I’m pleased for you,’ and mean it.

10.  The Blamer

He is always looking for scapegoats.  If something goes wrong, it’s somebody else’s fault.  He always finds someone to be blamed for any wrongdoings or failures even if he knows that he is responsible for his own actions.

I know there are literally hundreds of behavior patterns and I invite you to share your own list by leaving your comments below this post.

Your friend,

Nimia Acebes